Goodbye 2020 – and good deliverance to most of us.
I doubt you would find a person in the world whose life was not touched by Covid-19. It affects our jobs, our friendships, our interactions – and most importantly, our relationships and our sex lives.
Some have fought, others have thrived. But after a year of zooming in, online dating, and & # 39; are you sure it's okay to do it doggystyle, darling? You were on the subway today & # 39; is there any good news for our sex life for the coming year?
That depends on your particular preference, but I think we'll all be happy to know …
Sexpert Tracey Cox has revealed the sex trends she thinks will boom in the coming year (archive image)
We'll have more adventurous sex
At the beginning of the lockdown, the couples were happy to have time to rediscover each other's bodies. Fatigue set in over the months. Too much time – more precisely, too much time together – meant that lust jumped and the death of the Covid bed became a "thing".
But not for everyone.
Research from UK sex toy retailer Lovehoney found that 52 percent of couples had more adventurous sex during the crisis and used isolation to try new things like role-play, car sex, sex games, and erotic fantasies.
More importantly, 71 percent said they will resume their new sex routines once the crisis ends.
Tracey (pictured) predicted we will have more adventurous sex, including "power play".
More people will experiment with their sexuality
AdultFriendFinder (AFF), an occasional sex dating website, saw a dramatic increase in the number of users identifying themselves as bisexual on their website this year, especially among male users.
The 2020 health crisis made us all aware that time is short. Some people eventually decided to engage in lackluster or toxic relationships, others decided it went deeper than just being with the wrong partner and pondering their sexual identity.
Once plugged in is safe and legal again, AFF predicts that more people will want to test whether they are with different people. This can come in all different shapes and sizes, girl to girl, man to man, a bit of both, and beyond.
Experimentation is a strong topic for 2021 …
"Pegging" and power play are becoming more popular
Finding "What is BDSM?" Has increased by 70 percent. (That's bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism, in case you were one of the people who typed it. All are forms of power play).
BDSM dating app KinkD has asked nearly 3,500 users to reveal their top kink during lockdown, and cyber-play or virtual domination – online role-playing of BDSM scenes – has won by far.
Pegging – the stereotype of a woman wearing a strap-on dildo to penetrate her male partner – was the hottest sex trend of 2020.
Strap-on sales rose nearly 200 percent in 2020. Ten percent of the 1,000 women in a UK poll said they had tied their partner and one in ten said they would like to try.
There was even a pegging scene in the superhero movie Deadpool.
Unlike those who believe the guy must be secretly gay, pegging & # 39; s popularity is more due to the buzzing of the inversion of sexual roles and the stimulation of the male G-spot, the prostate.
Long-distance and virtual relationships will increase
If Lockdown taught us anything, we realized that you don't have to be physically in the room with anyone to enjoy the company. (Hands up, who had Christmas with the Zoom family?)
This has made us more open to virtual relationships and long-distance relationships.
Dating App Many Pisces found that half of all users have their location settings set to "anywhere": more than ever before.
There were other positive relationship problems.
Sixty-six percent said they appreciated deeper conversations more than they did before Covid. Seven in ten said they would like to schedule a virtual appointment even if restrictions were lifted and 33 percent were now open to long-distance relationships.
According to Badoo, video dating has become so widespread that a virtual date is the normal first step before meeting in the flesh.
Sex toy sales will continue to grow
Sex toy retailers around the world were one of the few winners of 2020.
According to Lovehoney, 42 percent of people used sex toys more frequently during the crisis, and 33 percent bought new sex toys during the lockdown. Unsurprisingly, 44 percent, especially among singles stranded alone, said they masturbated more.
The most popular Covid sex toy? Vibrators were number one. This was followed by dildos, toys for couples, male "strokers" (silicone sleeves that fit over the penis), butt plugs and love rings for couples.
Once you've tried a sex toy, you almost always buy more and sales keep rising. Traditionally, something used in the private sales of couple toys also exploded this year, and the trend is expected to continue into 2021.
We're going to consider coming back with an ex
If you've met or heard from an ex during the lockdown, you are not alone. I've heard of three exes I haven't had contact with in almost a decade!
Lockdown had the same effect as the breakdown of a long-term relationship: when we are suddenly lonely, we think of other people in our lives who made us happy. We then blow the relationship off the air and try to wipe it off and decide that our ex was the real love of our life and we should try to reconnect.
One study found that one in five had personally reached one or more exes since the pandemic. One in four had heard of an ex and most replied.
It's not just because people were sexually starved, bored, or wanted to rekindle old flames. Many people just wanted to make sure that the person they loved (or still love) was safe.
We will shift our obsession from orgasms to sexual mindfulness
If you have been fortunate enough to be on vacation and you have no children in school, chances are that you are indulging in some kind of "mindfulness."
Some people living close to their homes suddenly appreciated trees and fresh air, others the cathartic appeal of cooking, yoga or meditation.
This translated well in the bedroom.
Not just being in the room, but being in the moment, stops "watching". This is when you become so anxious about how you appear or look during sex that you forget to actually enjoy it.
Mindfulness also involves shifting the focus from having an orgasm to simply appreciating the giving or receiving of pleasure.
Then an all-round better sex year! No matter how old you are …
Older women will enjoy more sex and better sex
I spent most of 2020 talking to people over 50 about their sex lives for my book Great Sex Starts at 50. This can confirm that a US study in which one in four women after menopause wants a good sex life is actually true.
Advances in health care, changed societal attitudes towards sex and aging, and a generation of sexually liberated women mean that middle-aged people are sexually far more active and satisfied.
Since "hot menopause" is the topic of every other podcast, blog, and book, it's a trend that is unlikely to cool off.
We'll be more picky
The US social psychologist Justin Lehmiller found interesting results from a study that he started in mid-March (2020) and that was then carried out every 2 to 4 weeks with the participants.
When asked what the future might be in terms of relationship or gender, four in ten people expected at least some things to change after the pandemic.
Unsurprisingly, we choose who to sleep with.
16 percent said they will be more selective with their sexual partners, and 13 percent said they will spend longer time getting to know people before having sex with them. Fifteen percent said they would communicate more with partners about sexual risks.
… or will we?
“The second we're all vaccinated, it's not just my mask that comes off. My clothes are too, ”explains a single friend who hasn't had sex in a year.
Yes, she pays more attention to the things that people can transfer to one another. Yes, she has learned to value her own society, knows how to satisfy herself sexually and of course she will practice safe sex in all senses.
She will also make sure that the first man she sleeps with is as hot as her.
But make no mistake, she will be out there.
Many relationships became more serious during the pandemic.
It will be interesting to see how many of these are left once the vaccine is in place and the R number goes down.
Anecdotes suggest that singles crave physical contact and the joy of sex and can't wait to be out there again.
You can find Tracey's new book, Great Sex Starts at 50, anywhere good books are sold. Traceycox.com has more information on sex and love and on Tracey's two lines of products.
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