He was the American political heavyweight to be named the next president. She was the British starlet who made her way in Hollywood.
Now Dame Joan Collins has revealed how she once had to reject Bobby Kennedy's advances – and remind him that he was a married man.
In an open lunch interview with her friend Piers Morgan for The Mail on today's You magazine on Sunday, Dame Joan recalls how President John F. Kennedy's brother attacked her … but is still diplomatically curious about the details .
Dame Joan Collins tells it all in an open interview with her friend Piers Morgan in the Mail am Sonntag in You magazine
"Ethel, his widow, is still alive, so I really don't want to go into this too much because I don't want to hurt her," she says.
"That was one of the things I said to him," I'm married, you're married. "But he was so charismatic."
She recalls how President John F. Kennedy's brother Bobby Kennedy (pictured) once attacked her
The former US attorney general had a reputation for being female, with conquests like Kim Novak, Lee Remick, and allegedly Marilyn Monroe.
When asked how he took her refusal, Dame Joan simply says, "He's a gentleman, that's all I can say."
Dame Joan, who is celebrating her 70th on-screen this year, shares how she cried when she learned of his murder in 1968, five years after his brother was murdered.
"He would have been the most wonderful president," she says. "I know he was hated by many, but anyone who is brilliant, smart, and charismatic is hated."
Five-time married Lady Joan, 87, also recalls her two-year romance with a young Warren Beatty who was so energetic between the sheets that the Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Los Angeles had to replace the bed in its suite five times during the decade he stayed there.
LOVER: The 87-year-old reveals details of a two-year romance with a young Warren Beatty (pictured together) who says he wants to have sex several times a day
"I only knew him when he was a blatant stranger at 22, but he was pretty powerful," says Dame Joan, who reveals that he wanted to have sex several times a day.
"I was horrified because it was really too much."
While her love life has inspired acres of newsprint, Dame Joan insists she was never a Hollywood bed hopper.
"I haven't been in bed with so many men before," she says. “But if you look at my husbands and friends, they all look good. I am not attracted to men unless they are handsome. You can call me frivolous … but that's the truth. "
Friends: Piers Morgan is enjoying a socially aloof lunch with Dame Joan Collins at her favorite restaurant Club 55 on Pampelonne Beach in St. Tropez this July
Ain't nothing like Dame Joan
From Piers Morgan for you magazine
She is a legend, an icon, and our most enduring movie star of all time. How JOAN COLLINS celebrates 70 years in the business, her best friend Piers Morgan joins her for lunch. And sex ("Twice a day is too much, Dahling") Nothing is forbidden for rich men ("mean and selfish") …
Dame Joan Collins elegantly spewed a large piece of sea bass at Club 55, our shared favorite beach restaurant in St. Tropez, and suddenly made a dramatic announcement that silenced the table. "This year is my 70th year in the movie business!" She explained. "Sorry, WHAT?" I replied, amazed at what I had just heard. "You've been making films for 15 years longer than I've been alive?"
"Doesn't sound so surprised, Dahling," she chuckled theatrically. "I've been doing a lot of things longer than you live."
"What was your first film?"
"Lady Godiva rides again (published name was Bikini baby). I played a beauty contestant. "
With a cast that reads like a who's who of British acting – Diana Dors, Sid James, Trevor Howard, George Cole, Dora Bryan, Stanley Holloway, Kay Kendall, Jean Marsh, Alastair Sim and, unbelievably, Ruth Ellis, the four year old later became the last person to be hanged in Britain.
Joan wears a cloak and gloves, Eliza Jane Howell. Earrings, Merola London. Dress, the woman is deadly
Blink and you would miss her, but Joan's film career was going on and it never stopped. She has now made 76 films in one of the most enduring and successful careers in Hollywood history. Full Disclosure: I love Joan Collins. We eat together a lot of the year and she's one of the hottest, funniest and most glamorous people I know.
She does not suffer from fools – no matter what, not at all! – and has a natural brutal honesty, which means that she doesn't hesitate to tell you if she thinks you are talking utter nonsense.
And she has a delicious Sicilian trail towards those who cross it. When former BBC news anchor Michael Buerk interviewed her for the Radio Times and did a number of shrewd digs into her age, she retaliated with a stabbing attack on him in the Daily Mail with the headline: "Buerk by name, Buerk by nature . "
But what I love most about her is her limitless energy and zest for life.
She won't like it when I say that, but the great lady is now 87. Yet she exudes a relentless high octane zest for life, which puts people half her age to shame.
Joan was married five times in a long pursuit of marital reconciliation that eventually led her to the arms of handsome Peruvian theater producer Percy Gibson – her longest-lived husband at 18 and her last husband ("I'll never do it") was with someone else together as Percy, ”she often tells me.
Percy, 55, is a great guy – as smart, funny, and vicious as his wife, and full of old-school charm, manners and decency. His devotion to Joan is palpable, but so is hers to him.
I now count her as two of my best friends. With some discomfort, I agreed to interview Joan at the start of her 70th anniversary year.
After all, she told me personally where many of their bodies are buried … how far could I urge her to repeat all the fabulous stories she used to tell us over dinner?
Would I get the wasp treatment with Alexis Carrington Colby if I exceeded the mark?
Hat, Ana Bella Millinery. Earrings, Merola London. Gloves what Katie did. Great, deadly is the woman. Image director: Ester Malloy. Styling: Arabella Boyce. Makeup and Hair: Alyn Waterman at alynmakeuphair.co.uk. Dresser: Chrissy Maddison.
There was only one way to find out …
pier: Are you ready for this?
Joan: Yes, oh Jesus. Please be nice.
pier: Friendliness is of course my middle name. During your theater tour you have audience questions that you didn't like with the words "Next!" Completed. Are you going to use the same strategy today?
Joan: Yes. Next!
pier: You never say your age and you loathe interviewers who ask you how old you are. Let me put it another way: why do you look younger than me when you are 32 years older?
Joan: (laughs loudly) It's up to Percy, he's making me my game.
pier: Groucho Marx said you are only as old as the woman you feel. Are you just as old as the man you feel
Joan: I think when you are with a younger person, whether you are female or male, you want to keep up with them. Fortunately, Percy's father and my father were born five years apart at the beginning of the 20th century. So we had a lot of the same parental directions and attitudes that were slightly Victorian in many ways.
pier: Percy is my age, 55.
Joan: I know that and you two look very good for your age.
pier: If he hadn't come and I am clearly your optimal preferred age, would I have had the chance to become husband number five?
Joan: Well, you need to calm down a bit … but I like your sour joke and I think we could have some sparring games. So yeah I think you could have been a contender. I like you very much.
pier: Do you remember when we first met?
Joan: Yes, it was on the last Concorde flight from New York to London. You threw a glass of water in mid-air over Jeremy Clarkson …
pier: No, Clarkson threw it on me.
Joan: He has? Oh man. That was such a sad journey. I cried when we got home. A wonderful step for humanity, now it's gone.
pier: You must have been using Concorde the whole time?
Joan: Only if someone else has paid.
pier: You were a lightning baby in World War II. Have duck bombs brought you extraordinary fearlessness?
Joan: It helped a lot. It wasn't just in the bomb shelters. It was evacuated to different schools nine times and had to adapt even though I was only six or seven years old. Children this age can be very cruel, mean, rude and snobbish, and a new girl from London arriving in Tewkesbury or Chichester or Ilfracombe or one of the many places got a lot of flak. I think I designed my tank not to let things bother me too much.
pier: Does something bother you?
Joan: Of course some things do something, especially my family and of course Covid, but you can't get upset about everything.
pier: I was told that the only person who ever scared you was Bette Davis on the set of The Virgin Queen?
Joan: Not the only person, but she was a terrible old actress who didn't like young pretty girls. I was one of her six women waiting, and we all got together and hid in corners of the set to avoid her gaze being noticed.
pier: What if you got her bulging look?
Joan: When we giggled and didn't focus on our roles, she would scream, "Why do you think you'll ever be real actresses?" She was pretty rude.
pier: Have you ever stood against her?
Joan: Yes, a few years later on the night of the 100 stars in New York. We shared a dressing room and I was wearing this amazing, very low-cut gold lamé dress that designer Nolan Miller had made for me, and Bette said sarcastically, "You're almost wearing that dress, my dear." She smoked a cigarette and stared at me. So I got up and said, "Yeah, and it needs to be adjusted a little. Would you mind pulling it down, Bette, my dear?"
pier: What did she do?
Joan: She pulled it down angrily and then called Nolan the next day and said, "How can you get this woman to wear this disgustingly revealing dress?" To which Nolan replied, "Well, when you have it, flaunt it!"
pier: Your dad Joe was a tough cookie, but he gave you some excellent advice on what to do with predatory men …
Joan: Kneel them in the lower regions.
pier: How often have you done that?
Joan: A lot of. I was in a generation where women were like dolls and some men just looked at them as appendages so as not to be taken seriously. But I couldn't fall into the pit of the casting couch. I have often avoided that.
pier: How damaging was that for your career?
Joan: I think I lost Cleopatra. Both the head of the studio and the CEO of the studio made a promise to me if I would be nice to them and I wouldn't be nice to them.
pier: Gutsy …
Joan: Yes, but it gave me a reputation for being a slut because it was accepted with men like Noël Coward and Oscar Wilde to be funny and harsh, but not with a young woman.
pier: Your father also said that if you pursued an acting career, you would be washed ashore when you were 23.
Joan: He was right to be concerned – so many girls I knew got out of the business by 24 or 25.
pier: Would he have been amazed at how long your career lasted?
Joan: Well, Daddy was 86 years old so he saw some of my great success in the Dynasty and I knew he was very, very proud of me, even though he liked to pretend he wasn't. I heard he'd been talking to other people about me and Jackie (Joan's late sister and bestselling author) the whole time, but he would never give us praise for our faces. It was like that back then: don't tell the kids that they are special because they just get swollen heads.
pier: Did he ever tell you that he loved you?
Joan: No. He stopped hugging me when Jackie was born and I was four and a half years old. None of my parents were very loving. I am not very loving.
pier: What was the best advice your mom gave you?
Joan: Always wear night cream. I dated some women at lunch yesterday, most of whom were younger than me, and I have to say my skin looked a lot better than theirs because I have completely protected it all my life since I was 15.
pier: When was the last time you sunbathed without a hat or scarf on your face?
Joan: When I was 20, I go neck down in the sun because I love it, and when I get into the pool I wear a baseball cap and sunglasses. The face is a very sensitive area and I could say my face is my luck and I should better protect it.
pier: Did you want to be a star when you were young?
Joan: No. When I first went to Rada, I wanted to be an actress like Vivien Leigh who I really adored. When I went to the movies, I wanted to be more like Ava Gardner.
pier: What is the difference between a star and an actress?
Joan: I've never heard of half the people who are called stars, and I consider myself pretty knowledgeable about modern life. I read five newspapers a day, watch the news and know who the people are. So the stars twinkle for a while and then they usually fade. I was a little star in the 50s and 60s and a big star in the 80s and now a smaller star …
pier: I would say you are still a big star now.
Joan: (Pause) OK, I think you're right (laughs). Yes, when I look at myself objectively, I see that I am seen as such, but I consider myself a jobbing actor … or rather, a jobbing actress.
pier: Who was the biggest star of all?
Joan: Marlon Brando. First, he was a brilliant actor. Second, he was incredibly original in what he did and made some amazingly wonderful films like On the Waterfront and A Streetcar Named Desire. And third, he had a very colorful private life. Most of the biggest stars have very colorful personal lives. The media like this so they make you big and then the public buys it.
pier: Fame also has a very dark side. We were recently reminded of this in December with the 40th anniversary of the murder of John Lennon by a crazy fan.
Joan: Oh god, I knew John, I was really upset when he died. Though I think the person I was most angry about when she died, besides my mother, father and sister, was Princess Diana.
pier: Did you know her?
Joan: Yes. I really liked her. She had to face such a flood of media attention since she was 19. I remember going to an event in Palm Beach and there were hundreds of photographers there. She said to me: "Oh my god, is that always the case? I don't think I'll ever get used to it. “And I said,“ Yes, it always is, and you will get used to it. “She wrote me the most delightful letter when I sent her a book of mine and I found her very inspiring. Nolan Miller and I would go through pictures of her in fashion magazines and copy things she wore for me in Dynasty, and sometimes she would copy things I wore.
pier: I heard when she died, did you cry for three days?
Joan: Yes, I was in the south of France and a friend of mine called me at 6:30 am to tell me and I just couldn't believe it. I was terribly upset. I love the monarchy – but it was such a breath of fresh air. Now we have Catherine, who is also a breath of fresh air.
Pier: And we have Meghan too.
Joan: Oh, you can have it!
pier: No, I was rejected, thrown on the dust heap of her former friends and not needed on her social climbing ladder!
Joan: Yes, and we must never forget it …
pier: What do you think of Cancel Culture?
Joan: It's hateful. I think people should be able to express their opinions without being canceled, especially in schools and universities. I stopped saying something political on social media because I got so much hate mail when I mentioned going to an event for Nigel Farage and thought, "Oh my god, it's not worth it." So I'll keep my political opinions to myself and my friends.
pier: Tom Ford says that proper lovemaking with foreplay burns 400 calories. Did you test this theory?
Joan: What are you talking about – just kissing and caressing?
pier: No, we're talking about the whole Schebang.
Joan: Oh, screw? (laughs)
Getty Images, Rex Features, Alpha, MirrorPix, David M. Benett, MoviePix, Eddie Sanderson Archives, Terry O & # 39; Neill, Donaldson Collection, Bettmann Archives
Getty Images, Rex Features, Alpha, MirrorPix, David M. Benett, MoviePix, Eddie Sanderson Archives, Terry O & # 39; Neill, Donaldson Collection, Bettmann Archives
Joan: In this case, yes. I'm not exactly a calorie counter, but if Tom Ford says it it has to be true.
Pier: Your walls are covered with pictures of you with all kinds of world leaders – royal, political, religious. Who made the biggest impression?
Joan: Mrs. Thatcher and the Queen.
Joan: The Queen, because I think she is an incredible example of someone who is totally dedicated to their work. When she became queen at 25, she said, “I declare before you that my whole life will be devoted to your service.” I was a teenager then and found it very inspiring, and of course she did that. Mrs. Thatcher was Prime Minister when I played Alexis in Dynasty, and she was called the Iron Lady when I was called the Iron Maiden. I know she was hated for a lot of things, but I admired her. I went to her 80th birthday party, where unfortunately she was not doing well at all. I think she fried her brain because she only slept four hours a night which is terrible. She worked all the time, 20 hours a day.
Pier: Where is Boris Johnson on your list of the most impressive leaders?
Joan: (laughs) Go on!
pier: We may have slept in the same bed. I had your former fiancé Warren Beatty's old suite at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Los Angeles for a few years.
Joan: Have you changed the box springs?
pier: I was told that in the decade he was there, he went through five of them. I haven't found out if that's entirely up to you …
Joan: I only knew him when he was a blatant stranger of 22, but he was pretty powerful!
Pier: Is it true that your friend Joanne Woodward said he would make Warren happy, that he would need sex several times a day?
Joan: Yes absolutely. I was horrified because it was really too much and I felt like an oyster in a slot machine.
Cape, Eliza Jane Howell. Earrings, Merola London
pier: Was it all too exhausting?
Joan: Yes, it was. I am boring. I'm sorry, you ask most women if they want to have sex two or three times a day. They lie when they say they want to.
Pier: Who is the most famous star whose advances you have rejected?
Joan: Bobby Kennedy.
Joan: I know.
Pier: I still need some meat on this bone – what happened?
Joan: Well, Ethel (his widow) is still alive so I really don't want to go into that too much because I don't want to hurt her. That was one of the things I said to him, "I'm married, you're married." But he was so charismatic. When we first met I wore a black dot and he said, "I've always loved a woman in dot."
pier: Is that a dress?
Joan: It's a French tip.
pier: How did he take your refusal?
Joan: He's a gentleman, that's all I can say. He was another person whose death made me cry. He would have been the most wonderful president. I know he was hated by many, but anyone who is brilliant, smart, and charismatic is hated.
Pier: Yes we are. Has Donald Trump ever tried it on with you?
Joan: No, but he was trying to get me and Percy to buy an apartment in New York.
pier: What happened?
Joan: It was shortly after our first marriage and we were looking for apartments. We saw Trump at a premiere and he told us we had to come and buy one of his seats. So we went to check it out and it was a nightmare – tiny, with no closets and facing the United Nations.
Pier: What do you think of trump
pier: Do you like rich men?
Joan: No. Because they are very selfish, usually incredibly ugly, they treat women like belongings and many of them are incredibly mean. The only rich man I've ever been with was Arthur Loew Jr. (American film producer) for about nine or ten months, and he was very close and always counting the pennies.
pier: Have you ever had sex with an ugly man?
pier: Really, you kept a bar of aesthetic quality for nine decades?
Joan: Yes absolutely.
Pier: That's incredible.
Joan: No, I can't think of any. Mind you, I haven't been in bed with that many men, but if you look at my husbands and friends, they all look good.
Pier: Literally never had sex with an ugly person?
Joan: No. Try to find one on Google – you can't. Basically, it boils down to never going to bed with someone I wasn't attracted to, and I'm not attracted to men unless they are handsome. You can call me frivolous or decadent or whatever, but that's the truth.
pier: There is nothing wrong with having a highly aesthetic bar. My wife Celia has one too. What's the worst lie anyone has ever told you?
Joan: That I'm a terrible actress.
Pier: Who said that?
J.oan: Another student at Rada who was a little jealous of me.
pier: How did you answer?
Joan: I "ghosted" him, as you would say today.
Pier: What happened to him?
Joan: I think he died.
pier: Has he ever made it as an actor?
Joan: No. It was pretty hurtful, but I got a lot of terrible reviews in the early days all of them saying I was just beautiful and voluptuous and glamorous, not an actress. It took a huge toll on my confidence.
pier: Conversely, what is the best thing that someone has said about you?
Joan: Nigel Hawthorne, the best actor I have ever worked with, was very, very polite to me and said that I got a rum deal from critics because of my looks. It meant so much to come from him. I remember playing cards with Vivien Leigh once and she said she wasn't taken seriously as an actress until she started losing her looks which I found interesting because she was very beautiful.
Pier: But you never lost your looks …
Joan: I know it's true, isn't it … (laughs)
Pier: Have you been drunk like a skunk filming the orgy scene in? The stud?
Joan: Absolutely yes. We were all crazy.
Pier: Susanna Reid (Piers Good morning Great Britain Co-host always says that aging is a blessing. Do you agree (with that?
Joan: No, but as Maurice Chevalier said, it is better than the alternative.
pier: Why was Percy your longest surviving husband?
Joan: Oh come on, I've talked about it a million times, it's a quarter to one and I have a manicure in half an hour.
pier: Calm down, Alexis. Some of us worked three hours this morning. Just give me three reasons Percy was the best husband.
Joan: OKAY. He's my best friend, he's amazingly nice and he looks wonderful.
Pier: Who was the worst husband?
Joan: Peter Holm, the Swede.
pier: Do you still keep his engagement ring with everyone else?
Joan: Actually, I only kept the diamond part of it. Zsa Zsa Gábor told me to do this … "Give the ring back, keep the stone."
pier: What do you think is the secret to a successful marriage other than separate bedrooms?
Joan: Being very good friends, feeling able to talk about anything and still having a bit of mystery around you if that is possible even though you are together around the clock.
pier: Is it true that when a friend called you "bloody boring" you said, "Well, you're a boring shit"?
J.oan: It is absolutely true.
pier: How did he take it?
Joan: We broke up.
pier: Do you remember your first Rada audition?
Yeahn: Oh, brilliant, yes. My mom took me and I was so nervous. As I went inside I found a group of people including John Gielgud staring at me.
Joan: I thought I was going to die. Anyway, I got in.
pier: What's the trick for great acting?
Joan: Be as free as possible and not think about acting. And like Spencer Tracy always said, hit the marks and know your lines. My favorite acting story is about Laurence Olivier and Dustin Hoffman in The Marathon Man. Dustin had to be very out of breath for one scene so he ran around the set three times and came back drenched in sweat and said, “Okay, I'm ready to play exhausted now.” And Olivier replied, “Dear boy, why don't you try to act? “I love this story.
pier: How many of your leading men did you end up in bed with?
Joan: Only one. Sydney Chaplin (Charlie Chaplins Sohn, der zusammen mit Joan in der Hauptrolle spielte Land der Pharaonen).
Pfeiler: Wie hast du den anderen widerstanden?
Joan: Die meisten mochte ich nicht besonders. Paul Newman und ich verehrten uns, aber er war mit einer meiner besten Freundinnen (Joanne Woodward) verheiratet und ich wollte nicht den Ehemann von jemandem stehlen. Ich habe das einmal gemacht und das war genug.
Pfeiler: Wer ist der schönste Mann in der Geschichte Hollywoods?
Joan: Clark Gable. Er war der endgültige Filmstar.
Pfeiler: Die schlechteste Chat-up-Linie, die jemals jemand an dir ausprobiert hat?
Joan: "Hat dir jemals jemand gesagt, dass du ein sehr hübsches Mädchen bist?"
Pfeiler: Hat es jemals funktioniert?
Pfeiler: Was ist der nächste, den du zu Tode gekommen bist?
Joan: Ich habe einen schrecklichen Film namens gemacht Reich der Ameisen in den Florida Sümpfen. Es war sehr windig und der Fahrer dieses alten Buick oder Cadillac, eines dieser wirklich schweren amerikanischen Autos, öffnete mir die Tür und als ich ausstieg, schickte die volle Kraft des Windes die Tür direkt auf mein Gesicht und klopfte an mich raus. Es hätte mich umbringen können. Ich kam zu und lag auf dem Boden auf dem Feld.
Joan: Ja, sie standen neben mir und sagten: „Lebt sie noch?“ Ich hatte ein riesiges eiförmiges Ding auf dem Kopf und schickte meinen Kindern ein Polaroid mit den Worten: „Das muss deine Mutter tun, um deine Schulgebühren zu bezahlen Ich hatte so viel Glück, dass ich keinen dauerhaften Hirnschaden hatte.
Pfeiler: Wenn Sie für den Rest Ihres Lebens mit Meghan Markle, Madonna oder Michael Buerk auf einer einsamen Insel gefangen sein könnten, wen würden Sie wählen?
Joan: Oh Jesus Christus … ähm … Meghan. Ich denke, es wäre einfacher, mit ihr auszukommen. Ich kann Michael Buerk nicht leiden.
Pfeiler: Und Madonna wäre nur ein Schmerz in der A ***…
Joan: Sie ist eine Art Diva, oder? Ich denke, Meghan und ich könnten gut miteinander auskommen.
Pfeiler: Wie lange heiraten Sie Harry und Meghan?
Pfeiler: Wer ist der größte Modedesigner aller Zeiten und was war dein Lieblingskleid?
Joan: Yves Saint Laurent, und mein Lieblingskleid war eines, das Valentino für mich angefertigt hatte und das ich zu meiner Damehood-Party trug und das eine riesige rosa Schleife auf der Schulter hatte.
Pfeiler: Sie und Brigitte Bardot sind die bekanntesten Stars von St. Tropez. Hast du dich jemals getroffen?
Joan: Ja, einmal in den frühen 60ern in einem Hotel in Rom. Ich saß da und unterhielt mich mit vier jungen Männern auf einer Bar auf dem Dach, und Brigitte kam mit einem rosa-weißen Gingham-Kleid an und kam zur Bar. Drei der vier Männer zoomten direkt zu ihr, um sich zu ihr zu setzen. Sie war extrem sexy. Ich bekam nur ein kurzes Hallo.
Pfeiler: Das beste Buch, das du jemals gelesen hast?
Joan: Parfüm (der Kult-Bestseller von Patrick Süskind). Es ist unglaublich beeindruckend.
Pfeiler: Ihr Lieblingshotel?
Kleid, Gina Bacconi. Kap, Eliza Jane Howell. Ohrringe, Lara Heems. Halskette, Pebble London. Handschuhe, Schurken. Manschetten, Simon Harrison. Strumpfhose, Wolford. Sandalen, Joans eigene
Joan: Claridges. Es ist elegant und raffiniert, hat das beste Dekor und Essen und das wunderbarste Personal.
Pfeiler: Du bist allergisch gegen dicke Leute …
Joan: Nein, ich bin nicht allergisch gegen sie, ich mache mir Sorgen um sie …
Pfeiler: Sie bestellen Celia immer wieder, damit ich Gewicht verliere.
Joan: Ich nicht! Hat sie dir das gesagt? Ich habe es gerade en passant erwähnt.
Pfeiler: Sie liegen nicht falsch, aber es deutet darauf hin, dass Sie ein Problem mit dicken Menschen haben.
Joan: Du bist nicht fett, du bist nur ein bisschen mollig.
Pfeiler: Wann hast du das letzte Mal geweint?
Joan: Letzte Woche. Ich habe schlaflos in Seattle zugesehen und als Tom Hanks und Meg Ryan sich endlich im Empire State Building treffen und zusammen weggehen, habe ich geweint.
Pfeiler: Are you quite emotional?
Joan: Yes, I am… not violently so, but somewhat.
Piers: Your best and worst movies?
Joan: The best movie in terms of my performance was Steven Berkoff’s Decadence in which I played two roles.
Piers: And the one you dare not mention in civilised circles?
Joan: The one I mentioned earlier, the Empire of the Ants, which unfortunately was incredibly popular.
Piers: What is the best life lesson you’ve learnt?
Joan: Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Piers: If you could only have dinner with six famous friends every night for the rest of your life, who would they be?
Joan: Noël Coward, Oscar Wilde, Dorothy Parker, Oscar Levant, Coco Chanel and Margaret Thatcher.
Piers: I was waiting with bated breath then to see if I got the nod, given I must have had more meals with you this year than anyone other than Percy.
Joan: (laughs) OK, I’ll put you in, too. I thought you meant dead.
Piers: Biggest mistake you’ve ever made, apart from doing this interview?
Joan: Do you think this is a mistake?
Piers: No, I think it’s brilliant.
Joan: All right, marrying Peter Holm. That was a huge mistake.
Piers: Robert Wagner told you that being rich meant having ‘f***-you money’. By that criterion, are you rich?
Joan: Well, before Covid, I might have said yes, but not any more. It’s been very slow. I haven’t had any paying work for ten months.
Piers: You once blew cocaine over Sammy Davis Jr. Did he mind?
Joan: Yes, he was p***ed off. He said, ‘You’ve ruined my burgundy velvet jacket,’ and I said I’d brush it off.
Piers: I don’t think that was quite what he wanted to do with the cocaine…
Piers: Your sister Jackie was one of my favourite people. What was her greatest quality?
Joan: Her dedication to her work, which started when she was ten years old when she would write these amazing stories, in beautiful handwriting. She remained so dedicated to writing that even after she knew she had cancer and was told she only had two or three years to live, she wrote another three books. Jackie was a great person, I miss her all the time.
Piers: Do you think she watches over you?
Joan: Yes, definitely, she’s my guardian angel.
Piers: In what way?
Joan: There’s this little tiny fly that appeared shortly after Jackie died and now comes around a lot, even when it’s very cold. It buzzes around me and I just have a feeling of her being there whenever it appears. I’m going to get mocked for that, but I don’t care.
Piers: Who’s the rudest person you’ve ever met?
Joan: Michael Buerk! No, actually, it was some dreadful presenter in Australia. I don’t know his name and I don’t want to give him any oxygen of publicity, but I’ve never met anybody ruder or nastier and more horrible to me.
Joan and Piers out on the town
Piers: Do you now own more or less shoes than Imelda Marcos?
Joan: Less, nobody could have more than her.
Piers: How many do you have?
Joan: Fifty pairs.
Piers: Being an actor usually involves rising above constant rejection. What’s the best way to deal with it?
Joan: Shrug it off and go and have a martini and a few cigarettes, although I don’t smoke any more, so just the martini.
Piers: You recently starred opposite a cannibal in American Horror Story. If you had to eat human flesh to stay alive, whose would you eat?
Joan: I wouldn’t.
Piers: Even to stay alive?
Joan: To stay alive? I dont know. I don’t think I can answer that question, it’s horrible. Next!
Piers: If you only had two hours left to live, which restaurant would you go to and what would you eat?
Joan: I wouldn’t go to a restaurant, I’d stay at home with Percy and we’d have a baked potato with Beluga caviar and sour cream, and lots and lots and lots of vodka.
Piers: You were a germophobe long before coronavirus. Do you feel vindicated?
Joan: Yes! I wore masks and gloves when I travelled long before this. When I left LA in early March, people were pointing at me and mocking me. They’re not laughing now.
Piers: Have you ever changed a lightbulb?
Joan: It’s so funny you say that! I asked Percy to change a lightbulb this morning, so the answer is no.
Piers: You’ve said your only weakness is chocolate. What’s your favourite bar?
Joan: KitKat, because it’s not fattening.
Piers: In 1977, an astrologer told you that you’d have huge fame and success in America. Given how accurate that was, do you still consult them?
Joan: No, but when Percy and I were considering getting married, an actress friend, Arlene Dahl, did our charts and it turned out that we knew each other in a previous life and are totally, totally compatible and perfect for each other.
Piers: Do you believe in life after death?
Joan: That’s a tricky one, Piers. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t.
Piers: Do you pray?
Joan: No… yes… if somebody is ill, I pray for them to get better.
Piers: Final question. If you could write your own epitaph for your tombstone, what would it say?
Joan: She gave a lot of people a lot of pleasure.
Piers: I think that is completely true. Joan: Thank you.